My Daily Ride on a Minibus

At about 12:30 today I climbed into a minibus and slid down the bench to make room. A minibus is a pick-up truck with padded metal benches down each side, and a sheet metal roof for shade high enough for most Thais to stand in the back. I can stand on the metal step welded to the back of the truck and let my head stick up above the roof, but today there was enough room to sit down. And the inside of the roof has four little lever buttons running down the center so riders can buzz the driver when they need to get off.

As I settled into my seat, a truly foul can of Green Tea ignored in my hand, the woman across from me says,

"Sa."

Or she may have merely burped -- this point is unclear. I look at her and say,

"Sah Waa Dii Khrup."

This means hello in a respectful fashion, when spoken by a man. When spoken by a woman it means, "Hello, and did you know that I'm really a man?" I've made this mistake in reverse. She responds,

"Sah Wah Dii Kha," pauses, and continues with, "Larai Neaou."

I try to look benevolent and say nothing. I smile. I assume as I always do that the sentence following "Sah Wah Dii Kha" means, "My, aren't you tall?" or, "How tall are you?" (although I think this sentence would end in "otrai" which hers definitely does not) or perhaps, "You are too tall for this minibus." I know for sure she doesn't say, "You are so tall, could you come and help me fix my curtains," because I've heard this sentence on two previous occasions and I believe I would recognize it at this point. All of this pondering on my part means I say nothing.

The woman repeats, I think, "Lalai, Kun Myung."

I smile again and now take time to look the woman over. I have trouble gauging her age, but I think she is about 50. She is quite busy with prints. Her blouse is black with a flurry of fine white, curly lines -- it looks a bit like the web of a drunken Charlotte in the midnight sky -- and a grid of small red flowers cover the shirt as well. Her shorts or skirt or skort are a greenish mustard base with a print of pale peach and cream flowers, each with a bright red stamen. She wears worn brown sandals, the tiniest black pinprick stud earrings, and has had a pink mani/pedi within the last couple of days. Her complexion is simultaneously leathery and brittle. I realize that I've taken too long to respond.

Poogee, my Thai teacher got on the bus with me and is sitting to my right.

Poogee nudges me and says, "She say you handsome!"

I am at a loss for words. I'm also completely covered in paint, particularly the black fisherman pants that I bought at the market here so I'd have something to paint in. Everyone in the bus looks at me, but not the amused look of someone entertained by the situation. This is a look of expectation. What I should say here is, "Kahp Kun Khrup," which would mean thank you, respectfully.

Instead I say, "Bin ot lai." This is not helpful. This means, "What's the matter?" Although I believe in this situation it means something more like, "what is wrong with you?"

To recap:

She burps.
I say, "Hello Ma'am."
She says, "Hello sir. You are very handsome."
She repeats, "Yes, you. You are very handsome."
I respond, "What is the matter with you?"

So.... My Thai lessons are problematic. Poogee can attempt to teach my three words in a row, with simple and very different meanings, and I can hardly hear the difference between them. And this throws me a bit when I try to converse. I am forever saying, "Would I like ice?" rather than, "No ice please," because both of them sound an awful lot like "Nam Ken Mai." It is however very helpful of Poogee to try. I've managed to pick up some. The other volunteers and I bought all the paint that we used, and I purchased brushes etc. and some concrete as well. So I think they are trying very hard to return the favor in kind. In addition to Poogee's lessons, we are all invited to endless ceremonies -- most of which we can't go to because we'd never get anything done -- and other events. I saw 20 minutes of the middle school basketball championships the other day....

Ed, the brit, and I played football (soccer) with the staff of the Adult Rehabilitation Center the other day, and the other volunteers joined the fans to cheer us on. Ed was quite good, the best on the field. I wasn't bad, although I believe my main technique was to confuse the enemy. On two occasions I managed to kick off a shoe at the same time as the ball and run off, half-shod, with the ball as the opposing player chased after the wrong object.

I blame a small part of my incompetence on the pre-game ritual here, which seems to be drinking shots of hooch before taking the field. The jar of redish liquid contained floating wood chips, but I drank it as indicated. Ed declined, which I suspect helped his play. The entire first half of the game my belly rumbled with the heat. And I did manage to take two shots at the goal, which is more than I had hoped for.

Painting goes well. We've done most everything in the one building we really thought needed painting, and we are working on a second coat in a few places. I'm going to the local "Home Depot" this afternoon to try and find new table tops. The tables they use for everything now are of old and rotting wood so they can't possibly be cleaned between meals, and I think something else would really keep the bacteria down. I'm thinking of just covering them with linoleum, perhaps.

The New Year's Celebration approaches. I don't know much, but I have three pieces of information:

-- I've been asked to be in the parade.

-- I've been told to wrap everything electric in plastic bags.

-- It has been suggested that I buy a super-soaker. Or a bucket.

I'll let you know how that goes....

At my sister in law's request, a photo of me: (The photos taken by the kids are usually blocked by fingers and the heads of competitors, so this is a photo taken by Ed. In my right hand is Asan, and I'm not entirely sure who is in my left hand.)